Lynda Ryan, Child and Adult Psychologist
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MINDFULNESS AND THE ALLEVIATION OF SUFFERING

27/5/2020

 
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Hello Everyone -

    Hope you are all well and happy!

    The statement above is quite a strong one to make about the power and effect of Mindfulness in our lives, don’t you think? Yet, it’s absolutely true!

    One of the cornerstone teachings in Buddhism is that of The Four Noble Truths.

    The first is the Truth of Suffering - that, we can certainly acknowledge is true - that suffering is a component of the human experience.

    The second is the Truth of the Cause of Suffering - often described as wanting what we don’t have and not wanting what we do have - commonly referred to as attachment/clinging and aversion/avoiding, denying, pushing away, attempting escape. You may have noticed that neither of these includes contentment or peace of mind.

    The third Truth is The Cessation of Suffering - that it can come to an end!

    The fourth is The Way to that Cessation - how to do it! Mindfulness is that way.

    Mindfulness has become very prominent in the media and is the subject of a great deal of research - pretty well because it is so effective in dealing with personal, relational and social forms of suffering.

    Mindfulness is very simple, yet very profound. It refers to the ability to be present.

    In my last post, I offered the suggestion that you stop whatever you are doing, such as reading this message, and just look around at the room you are in. Notice the pieces of furniture, pictures on the walls, the light coming into the room, the window, outside the window, for a minute or two. Go ahead. Take some time to do it. I’ll wait.

    Now ask yourself,  “in this moment, am I okay?”

    Notice your answer. Notice the full depth of your response.  

    Isn’t it intriguing that when we are living in present time - just simply this moment - we can experience stillness and we are very deeply okay. As if the mind has Paused.

    We can connect with our own being, with our open clarity, with the sense of the situation and how best to respond.

    Why isn’t our life always clear, simple and straight-forward like this?

    The answer is simple. Usually there’s a lot of interference going on, mind activity, noise generated by random thinking and firmly-held beliefs - then projecting all of this onto each brand new moment.

    Not only does this rob us of our freedom and ability to live our actual life, with clarity, vitality and contentment, but they also impose perceptions which are often repetitive and outworn. They bring no joy!

    It’s the difference between living in REALITY - with endless possibilities and choices, or living in a story we’re making up, and telling ourselves.

    The content of these stories, these on-going narratives, can only pertain to images of “the past”,  or to images of  “the future”, kind of same old, same old. Neither holds the openness, sense of possibilities and vitality of being present to this unique moment of our life, occurring now.

    Our actual life only ever takes place NOW and we can be open to welcome each moment as it flows. 

    Stopping periodically throughout the day to stop, to look around, to connect with your own presence is deeply restorative and enlivening. In that moment we are in touch with our own authenticity, with our own actual life. The only time we ever live is now - in this Present Moment. 

    Moment by moment, life is not only very manageable, but vividly alive - an open adventure. Even in a situation we might describe as “difficult”, we are free to live it in the way we think best, with interest, care,  and a sense of freedom.

    I edited a segment from a talk I heard recently by Byron Katie, here it is:

    What a Lovely Morning!  I am assuming this is also true for you! There is nothing going on in my head to interrupt that experience.
I am observant now, waiting, for some idea, concept, some memory or event in the  mind - or in the mind’s eye - to interrupt this well-being, this serenity.

    So far - so good!

    Okay - Bring It On!

    I’m waiting for some “past” or some “future”  that would either depress me or bring anxiety - those stories of “not-now past” or “not-now future”.

    They are invited to step forward - show themselves!

    Which of them could move me from this present experience, into an illusion that attempts to replace the reality of this moment now - which continually is?

    Just waiting here for a “not-now” to come like a tidal wave and take over this free-spiritedness.

    So far, so good!

    I’m open to SEEING it - rather than have it creep in and take over, without my awareness of what just happened!

    So far, so good!

    Good Morning!

    I see Mindfulness as something of an up-grade as to how we can use and  make the most of our mind - and our life!
    I have tried my best to make it clear, it becomes more a part of us the more we practice it. I’ll speak more to that in my next post.

    Meanwhile, I hope it will be an interesting - and liberating concept to “try on”, see how it fits, and experience it for yourselves! You can play with it!

    I am also hoping that it will bring some spaciousness and greater confidence in how you perceive, process and respond to this unique situation we are all living together!

Continue to be Free and Happy - Right Where You Are!
I've attached a very special song for you here!
Warmest wishes and thoughts!

Lynda


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jEfxkSxppI4

HAPPY MOTHERS' DAY

9/5/2020

 
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Hello Everyone -

    Thinking of you, and hoping you are finding peace and well-being during these Days of Beautiful Weather and Sunshine - even if we are experiencing them mostly through the Window!

    It’s also Mothers’ Day! A unique one! No restaurants, flowers, perfume or chocolates - although we can still make our own cards, make paintings of flowers and can still write poems and sing out our love for Mom! (Breakfast in Bed is still an option!!)

    Mothers’ Day has even wider implications - it’s a wonderful occasion to acknowledge that loving, care-giving and nurturing spirit in us all!

    Thoughtfulness for the lives of others and our wish to be of help is so evident at this time. There is a general attitude we seem to hold, recognizing that everyone is struggling in some very personal and unique way.

    There is a greater willingness to be kind and to feel concern, with a sense that each one of us matters. 

    We know that we are all sharing something vitally important and  we want to do the best we can, even though we aren’t sure exactly how things will turn out.
Our hearts are expanded - with greater warmth  and openness.

    The Spirit of the Caring Mother is touched in us all.  

    To honour all those who have mothered us, and those whom we have mothered, here is a lovely little poem, for a Mothers’ Day every one of us can celebrate!


When you thought I wasn’t looking,
I saw you hang my  first painting on the refrigerator,
and I wanted to paint another one.


When you thought I wasn’t looking,
I saw you feed a stray cat,
and I thought it was good to be kind to animals.


When you thought I wasn’t looking,
I saw you make my favorite cake,
and I knew that little things were special things.


When you thought I wasn’t looking,
I felt you kiss me goodnight,
and I felt loved.


When you thought I wasn’t looking,
I saw tears come from your eyes,
and I learned that some things hurt
and it’s alright to cry.


When you thought I wasn’t looking,
I saw that you cared,
and I wanted to be everything that I could be.


When you thought I wasn’t looking,
I looked.
and I wanted to say thanks,
for all the things I saw
when you thought I wasn’t looking.


Have a Lovely Mothers’ Day!
Be Happy and Well.
Lynda
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    Lynda Ryan

    a psychologist who has been practicing, working with, and teaching Mindfulness for almost 30 years. She has trained personally with Jon Kabat-Zinn and Thich Nhat Hanh.

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    Archives by title (alphabetical)

    All
    ❧ A MINDFULNESS MESSAGE - KEEPING OPEN KEEPING IN TOUCH
    ❧ ENJOYING MINDFULNESS
    ❧ FIRE CIDER AND INNER PEACE
    ❧ HAPPY MOTHERS' DAY
    ❧ HAPPY NEW YEAR
    ❧ MINDFULNESS - ALLOW YOUR HEART TO BECOME A CRADLE FOR THE CHRIST CHILD
    ❧ MINDFULNESS AND DIFFICULT EMOTIONS
    ❧ MINDFULNESS AND INNER PEACE
    ❧ MINDFULNESS AND THE ALLEVIATION OF SUFFERING
    ❧ MINDFULNESS AND THE CORONAVIRUS #1
    ❧ MINDFULNESS AND THE CORONAVIRUS #2
    ❧ MINDFULNESS AND WELL- BEING
    ❧ MINDFULNESS - BEAUTIFUL LUNAR NEW YEAR WISHES
    ❧ MINDFULNESS - BEING A BEAUTIFUL PERSON TO LIVE WITH
    ❧ MINDFULNESS DAY TO DAY
    ❧ MINDFULNESS EVENING - FRIDAY SEPTEMBER 25TH 2020
    ❧ MINDFULNESS EVENING - SEPTEMBER 25TH 2020
    ❧ MINDFULNESS EVENINGS - ONLINE
    ❧ MINDFULNESS EVENING WEDNESDAY OCTOBER 21 2020 "LIVING IN THE PRESENT MOMENT"
    ❧ MINDFULNESS - LIVING WITH AN EASEFUL MIND & A JOYFUL HEART
    ❧ MINDFULNESS - LOCKDOWN NIGHTS IN OXFORD
    ❧ MINDFULNESS - THE WIDE OPEN SKY
    ❧ MINDFULNESS - WHY IS THE PRESENT MOMENT SUCH A BIG DEAL?
    ❧ OXYGEN FOR INDIA
    ❧ SUPERVISION AVAILABLE ON INCORPORATING MINDFULNESS INTO CLINICAL PRACTICE
    ❧ THE SIMPLICITY OF THE PRESENT MOMENT
    ❧ THICH NHAT HANH - A PASSING
    ❧ THINKING OF YOU

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